Ask, Tell, Make: How to Fail the Test of Victimhood

Ask, Tell, Make: How to Fail the Test of Victimhood

The Complete Combatant, Shelley Hill, pays tribute to her friend, William Aprill, who taught her about the "Ask, Tell, Make "method of shutting down a crime about to be perpetrated against you. In other words, learn how to fail the test of potential victimhood right away.

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First, I would like to introduce William Aprill. He was a friend. He was funny, witty, loyal and loved to laugh. William traveled through Atlanta so often that when he called, I knew that usually meant that we were meeting somewhere for lunch or dinner on this travel day. He was also a "foodie." He loved good food, canning pickles and cooking. 

I made him what I called "Adult Chili" during one of his visits. He loved it so much that he insisted that I make it whenever he was in town. The name was officially changed to "William's Chili" in 2017. He loved to support his friends, loved my Image Based Decisional Drills concept and picked eight images so he could have a "William Aprill Expansion pack."  He loved his friends fiercely and we all knew it. [William Aprill died in August 2020.]  

Now it's time to introduce you to William on a professional level, so pull up a chair, this may take a while. William was a competitive shooter, excellent presenter, licensed mental health professional, high level educator and one of the most unique people and brilliant minds that I have ever had the pleasure of knowing. William was a former deputy sheriff and Special Duty US Marshal that specialized in educating the community about violent criminals, their decisions, their perspectives, their backgrounds and their mindsets. All the while, he was also educating us to look for cues, means to avoid and to use this knowledge to build a solid mindset that can be used in self-protection. 

One of my favorite teachings from William was his "ASK, TELL and MAKE" series. 

William says that the "blitz" attack is not that common, and it's more like an interview. Here's how it goes down:

• The bad guy starts at a distance and starts asking your questions like, "Can I have a light?" 





• He really does not need a light, he is walking towards you and interviewing you for the job of a victim. (You don't want that job; your job is assertive action and to stay in control of the situation.) 





• Once you think you are chosen, William encourages you to pay attention to that person and prepare for verbal interaction that you control, not them. 





• William calls this style of verbal escalation "ASK, TELL and MAKE." 

ASK

Be friendly, use your hands to animate "Stop" and ASK something like this: "Hey, could you hold up right there?" If this person had no intent, he would probably stop. You now have your first sign that this person probably had no criminal intent. If he asks you a question, you can be friendly, use your hands to animate "stop" and say, "I am sorry, I don't" or "I am sorry, I can't." Same deal, if he listens and respect your first "no," then he may not be looking for someone vulnerable. If he ignores your "no," you immediately escalate to our next verbal command. 

TELL

We are not friendly now. We now move quickly into the TELL stage. We use our hands in large unfriendly "stop" gestures, our face is unfriendly and our voice is unfriendly. We say, "Stop now!" If he ignores ASK and TELL, that means he is failing to stop, which means it's time for you to escalate once again. 

Time is of the essence. We do not keep repeating our ASK or our TELL. If you do this, it will lose its power. 

MAKE

This is now MAKE them stop time. MAKE is usually verbal, combined with an action. In other words, you would yell, "Get away from me!" ... while doing something, such as the following actions:

• Do you have pre-need decisions in place so you can be explosive? 





• Have you trained in different non-lethal, less-than-lethal and lethal tools? 





• Have you practiced drawing to a "low ready" and have another set of verbal commands ready? 





• Are you capable of running? 





• Are you prepared for a full-on fist fight or ground fight? 

Your ability to MAKE them stop all depends on what you are efficient in. 

CYA (Not that one, though)

Do you know what CYA means? Nope, not what you thought! It means "Can You Articulate?" You may have to explain your actions to the police so articulating that there are three verbal escalation steps that you practice so you can judge if a person means you harm.  You ASK them to leave you alone, ignored? You TELL them to leave you alone, ignored? Then you MAKE them leave you alone.

Remember, you have been using the ASK, TELL and MAKE series for years with your kids, dogs, etc., so do not be intimidated because you would be using them on a stranger. Practice these three steps so much that the words just fly out of your mouth. 

I would like to thank William for everything that he has contributed to our education over the many years of sharing. ASK, TELL and MAKE is just the tip of the ice berg that is William Aprill. You can just Google him to find many articles, blogs and videos that has William's work but since I am a visual personal, I am partial to videos. You can find a wonderful William Aprill Tribute page on the Personal Defense Network. 

Source: Ask, Tell, Make: How to Fail the Test of Victimhood